Having a bestie of the opposite sex is just a relationship breaker

There is nothing wrong having a member of the opposite sex as a bestie when single, but does it  seem right to keep one when in a romantic or serious relationship?

 

Currently, everyone seem to have a “bestie”. I actually consider it trendy right now. The word “bestie” is just a fashionable way of saying “best friend.” It’s ok. There are no issues with that since everyone is free to choose whatever and whoever they want. You can decide as a lady to have a guy as your bestie or as a guy, your bestie can be of the feminine gender. People actually have different reasons why they choose the opposite sex as their bestie or best friend.

 

When asked, some people will say “she understands more than my male friends, she has a special way of listening to my problems, it is always fun being with her, I am always myself when i’m around her and no need to fake, or he spends more time with me than my girlfriends, I learn a lot from him than I do when i’m with the girls, his company is all I need to be happy, fun is being with him or her, we have been childhood friends, and so on and so forth. The list is not exhaustive.

It's ok to have a bestie while single, not when in a relationship.

 

As earlier mentioned, it is almost considered normal having a member of the opposite sex as bestie or best friend, but it is almost impossible to keep that while in a relationship. Even in a marriage relationship, it is really not advisable. Having mentioned this to some people, they seem to have some reservations about it. This is because it has a special way of breaking relationships.

 

 

Once you are into a serious, romantic or exclusive relationship, whatever it is you have with your so-called bestie of the opposite sex should end. Why? Because, the term bestie or best friend, is someone’s closet friend. By this we mean, someone you always hang out with, someone who’s got your back, someone who’s got you covered in good and bad times. You guys go to the movies together, shop together, go to events together, always chit-chatting, have fun being with each other. Basically, it is always two of you all the time.

 

Now, with the explanation above, does it not sound like the same thing you will be doing with your partner in a relationship? How else do you wish to manage these activities having a bestie of the opposite sex and your partner? It is obviously not realistic because one will be suffering. It’s either your relationship with your bestie is flourishing because you spend time with him or her and that of your partner in a relationship is dwindling. And vice versa.  If you want to spend all your time with your best friend, which time or attention will you now spend or give to your boy friend or girl friend? You can’t eat your cake and have it. This particular issue is a relationship breaker on its own.

 

Your partner should be your bestie, no one else.So, the question is: Why do you need to keep someone that close when you have a boy friend or girl friend? I am not saying you should cut off all your friends regardless of gender just because you are in a relationship. No! Friendship is important. But, you just have to save yourself the stress of crashing your exclusive relationship by keeping any other bestie that is not your partner in a relationship. If not, gradually that relationship of yours will begin to crack and grow cold. Then, boom! Everything falls apart.

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